The Lowest Points

last book i've read: don't recall
currently caressing my ears: playlists I made on FB
general mood: deeply depressed
quote: all good things come to an end.

Simply, I effed up. I lied, I didn't make myself clear, and I lost a dear friend. Had I seen this end coming, I would have done it differently. But instead, I am left with this hole where love used to be. It's gone now.

I cannot believe my severe stupidity. I thought I could share and that would make everyone happy. Instead, I shared and also took. I was selfish, more than I wanted to admit. And now I've lost someone enormously important to me. He affected me deeply, and now I don't know if I'll find my way back in again. He said he used to trust me, one of the only ones in fact, and now, who knows. I failed him completely. And I wish that truth didn't hurt so bad.

We dig our holes. I guess I'm now the only one who can get myself out. I will, eventually. When I'm through mourning the loss. I do know that life will go on, but right now, it's the lowest point I've ever sunken to. I wish I'm sorry were enough right now.