lucky days

today was not one of my lucky days. it's been forever since i've felt this despondent. truly, it must be withdrawal symptoms from my husband being away the entire weekend, but i wonder. my mind plays tricks, and as much as i attempt to keep the poison out, it slowly creeps in. talking to him will help. i hope.

perhaps i was due for a lonely day. usually being alone emboldens me and i feel free. today there was no such feeling. the multitude of factors contributed: mom leaving and going home, husband away, working on a windy day, thoughts about finances and jobs.

perhaps it's the sunday night blues, cured only by some sorely missed live jazz. and a drink or two. perhaps....