upon review

last book i've read: The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz
currently caressing my ears: the soft purr of a fan
general mood: dreamer's fantasyland, fabulously in love
quote: "Like the voice of a heavenly choir, love's sweet music
flows on." -- Bambi

and....

Nunc Scio Quit Sit Amor --Virgil (latin, now I know what love is)

I just went over 5 years worth of blogging posts, focusing on the last year. It's been the most bipolar of my life, but I learned so much from all the pain. It was so filled with love as well. I've learned how to love without expecting it in return. I've also so joyfully learned what true love is. The kind that sticks with you, leaves you in heaven, allows you freedom and joy, doesn't pull or push you down, but only seeks to lift you up. The kind that is free and unconditional and supportive and not bipolar and gentle and kind ( always kind!) and respectful and sweet. I can't believe how lucky I am.

I never tire of dreaming of Tony. Our conversations are so deep and wonderful, we touch every base and always with such brutal honesty. Our time together is so blessed and creative and supportive, I miss him when I'm not near him. But we bridge the gap easily and without any stress. We comfort one another, build each other up, reveal our souls, and touch each other physically, emotionally, and spiritually all the time. His eyes reveal so much love and care to me. Tony makes me smile, while he smiles til his cheeks hurt. I savor every moment with him, and the love we create doesn't compare to anything I've had before. He brings something so new and amazing and refreshing to the table that I can't even fathom how much I was settling before. We are on another plane of understanding. We speak the same language, we adore the other so endlessly, and I cannot help but glow.

I've never found someone to just play with. Someone who loves as much as I do, and who eminates that love throughout. Now, we play together. And nothing will ruin our fun.